Sidelined (I benched myself!). Thin lining.

I left you all hanging! So sorry!!!! My lining grew to a measly 7 mm. Triple stripe. Doctor suggested I move forward but I canceled. I’m now going to try again in September. I spoke to my old RE who suggested tamoxifen to help build uterine linings (I cannot believe this is happening but may explain why I keep miscarrying). I’m a little surprised that I was told to go ahead with a thin lining. My new nurse encouraged me to trust the doctor but it wasn’t Schoolcraft on duty so I just decided to trust my gut. My old nurse, when I went in to tell her my feelings that I should not proceed with a thin lining, told me that she agreed and that she thinks I can do better.

So there you go. The truth is, I’m in no shape to be pregnant. Too much stress and even though it has nothing to do with getting pregnant, it does have something to do with staying pregnant. I’ve started taking Vitamin E and L-arginine as there is study that shows improvement with linings and addition of these supplements (and vaginal viagra but the doctor won’t give it to me). I’m going to ask about tamoxifen….we’ll see. I also started B complex and noticed an immediate change to my anxiety (especially morning anxiety – can you imagine waking up at 6:30am and feeling like you need a xanax…it isn’t fun).

Thanks for checking in on me and I appreciate the comments and notes. I wish life was a bit easier but it just isn’t.

I encourage anyone who is going through IF to always trust your gut, research until your eyes hurt and know your body. Do not put your faith and trust in any doctor as YOU know your body best and if you don’t – get to know it. That is the best advice I could give anyone and wish I knew this ten years ago.

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Transfer time

Lining close to 8 and growing. CCRM seem to be the master of dropping balls these days. Hello? Toooooo big. Big money maker, eh? Well doctors, this is my last shot so you better hope you give me some attention. I cannot believe the number of times my new nurse has lost my annual or couldn’t find one if the 500 consents I sign and fax as a part time job. I want this over as much as I want it to work for a number of reasons. A is adamant that he will have a brother and a sister. He even got the name right…snake we have not uttered since he was in utero.

So I am going to be poked and prodded and try not to think about work. Sorry I’m a shitty blogger but I truly found something that makes my life complete even if I have Alex and done. Now I have hugs from kids each day…they think I am cool because I am the “principal” and I think they are the most beautiful creatures I’ve ever met. I’ll keep you post…either way, here on out we talk happy. I’m willing to make a lot of changes to get there. I’m armed with IGG, dexamethazone and more to keep my body from going into the den of destruction.

I also bought the six day early result but may bug CCRM to do an early blood test. Oi.