Sperm.

Today we did our first of two sperm injections.  We had to take our son with us – which proved to be a huge nightmare.  I’m very sensitive to the feelings of my fellow infertiles and strongly believe that a child has no place in a fertility clinic.  It never really upset me but had I had several failed cycles, I don’t think I’d be able to bear seeing one at the doctor’s office.  Anyway – he came along for lack of child care options.  C and I took turns keeping him occupied and tried very hard not to let him tear the entire waiting room apart (no luck).  C gave his specimen and we then went to McDonald’s to wait for them to prepare the sperm – spin it free of white blood cells, crappy sperm, etc.  When we arrived back 2 hours later they were ready for me.  When I saw the nurse she said, “well your husband has a great sample for you – he has 85 million sperm ready here”.  My jaw nearly dropped to the ground.  85 million post wash!  That is 120 million pre wash – just insane.  Let me put it this way – you only need 20 million post wash for an IUI to have a good chance of being successful.  The nurse advised me not to tell him because, as she said, he would get a big head.  I agreed…but ended up telling him.  I’m not sure why I did this because I’d much rather have him believe that his sperm are the reason we are doing these procedures but, I guess it isn’t anymore!

On to the insemination, I normally don’t see my doctor during cycles – this is a large practice and the doctors all rotate for procedures.  Of course I know my doctor and have had many chats with him but I am just not used to spreading my legs and finding him down there – if you know what I mean.  It is so much easier when I don’t really know the person.  So, in walks Dr. S – who is rather young and handsome and all of a sudden I realized that I had not even bothered to make myself acceptable for viewing (to put it delicately).  The poor guy basically had my entire womanhood in all its glory right in his face – and I was cringing the entire time.  In the middle of the procedure – after he had inserted the speculum – he asked the nurse to hold down on my bladder as he was having trouble inserting the long tube into my uterus.  And then the nurse says, “oh be careful not to pee on the doctor”.

Oh darn – just what I had in mind to do.

I was so glad when that shit was over.

I was also glad that my doctor seemed stumped by my “excellent response” to low dose stims.  When I asked him what he thought about all of this and how it could benefit future IVF cycles should I not get pregnant he said he would have to have a think about it.  Well I already thought about it and came to the conclusion that I have spent thousands of dollars on medication and probably damaged perfectly good eggs because of a protocol that was all wrong for me.  Thanks doc.

So – IUI part 2 is in the morning.

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